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12 Shots
A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.
The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"

The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had."

The bartender says, "What do you have?"

The guy says, "75 cents."





Give a man a fish
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day!



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  • Application rejections won 50.40% of the times
  • QUOTES FROM ACTUAL PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS won 49.53% of the times