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A man with a pegleg, hook hand and...
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and an eyepatch went to apply to be a pirate.
Interviewer: How did you get that pegleg?
Pirate: Arrr. I got me leg shot off during the first world war.
Interviewer: How did you get that hook?
Pirate: I got me hand cut off by a big knife.
Interviewer: What about your eyepatch?
Pirate: It was a rainy afternoon and I looked up into the sky and a bird pooped in me eye.
Interviewer: And that put your eye out?
Pirate: No, it was the day after I got me hook.
Bathtub Seizure
Q: What do you do if someone's having a seizure in a bathtub?
A: Throw in a load of laundry.
Thank you for your vote!
You can see the results below:
- Nine Words Women Use won 48.53% of the times
- 50/50 relationship won 48.52% of the times