Vote For Your Favorite Joke

A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet...
A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet."I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."When the woman returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds."Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The woman nodded. "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.""From hunger, you mean?""No, from skipping."

Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole...
Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole for what seemed like forever. He'd waggle, look down, look up, but never start his backswing. Finally David, his playing partner, asked, "Why on Earth are you takingso long to make this shot?""My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse, and I want to make this shot a good one," said Bob."Good Lord," said David, "you haven't got a chance of hitting her from here."

Latest Joke Fight Results:

• A staged wedding to bust dealers was a winner against A man and his Alligator
• Baseball heaven was a winner against A DIET QUIZ
• A horrible curse was a winner against An ode to old age
• A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor... was a winner against An Honest Lawyer
• A very interesting fact was a winner against An Internet Christmas
• A guy was driving home one evening... was a winner against A final diagnosis
• A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner... was a winner against An Evil Curse
• A College Student’s Night Before Christmas was a winner against A man walked into
• A bus filled with politicians was driving through the... was a winner against A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items...
• Bad computer viruses was a winner against Anniversary