A wife was berating her husband...
A wife was berating her husband. He motioned for her to quiet down saying, "Don't unleash the beast in me."The wife snickered and replied, "Unlike a lot of women, 'dear', I'm not the least bit afraid of a mouse."

A little sports match
"...And the halftime score here at the Colleusium is Lions 7,Christians Nothing. We'll be right back after these messages..."