Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway? She wanted to lay it on the line.  Why did the unwashed chicken cross the road twice? Because he was a dirty double crosser.  Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? The stay on the same side  Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? He heard the referee calling fowls  Why Did The Chicken Cross The Playground? To get to the other slide.  Why did the rooster cross the road? To cockadoodle dooo something  Why did the rubber chicken cross the road? She wanted to stretch her legs.  What do you call a chicken crossing the road? Poultry in motion.  Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have enough guts  Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have enough guts  Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken.

Can I play the piano once these are off?
A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands.

"Doctor," says the man excitedly and dramatically holds up his heavily bandaged hands. "Will I be able to play the piano when these bandages come off?"

"I don't see why not," replies the doctor.

"That's funny," says the man. "I wasn't able to play it before."