Blind man
A nun in the convent walked into the bathroom where mother superior was taking a shower.
"There is a blind man to see you," she says.
"Well, if he is a blind man, then it does not matter if I'm in the shower, send him in."
The blind man walks into the bathroom, and mother superior starts to tell him how much she appreciates him working at the convent for them.
She goes on and on and 10 minutes later the man interrupts, "That's nice and all, ma'am, but you can put your clothes on now. Where do you want me to put these blinds?"
A drunk stumbles along a Baptismal servi...
A drunk stumbles along a Baptismal service on a Sunday
afternoon down by the river. He proceeds to stumble down
into the water and stands next to the Minister. The Minister
turns, notices the old drunk and says, "Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?"
The drunk looks back and says, "Yes sir, I am."
The Minister then dunks the fellow under the water and pulls
him right back up.
"Have you found Jesus?" the Minister asked.
"No, I didnt!" said the drunk.
The Minister then dunks him under for a quite a bit longer,
brings him up and says, "Now brother, have you found Jesus?"
"No, I did not!" said the drunk again.
Disgusted, the Minister holds the man under for at least 30
seconds this time, brings him up and demands, "For the grace
of God, have you found Jesus yet?"
The old drunk wipes his eyes and pleads, "Are you sure this
is where he fell in?"