Lycoris has buried all the female friends she had, Fabianus: would she were the friend of my wife!(Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

You complain, Velox, that the epigrams which I write are long. You yourself write nothing; your attempts are shorter. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Thou art so witty, profligate and thin, At once we think thee Satan, Death and Sin. (Quote by - Edward Young)

If you wish, Faustinus, a bath of boiling water to be reduced in temperature,--a bath, such as scarcely Julianus could enter,--ask the rhetorician Sabinaeus to bathe himself in it. He would freeze the warm baths of Nero. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Somewhere in the world there is an epigram for every dilemma. (Quote by - Hendrik Willem Van Loon)

I could do without your face, and your neck, and your hands, and your limbs, and your bosom, and other of your charms. Indeed, not to fatigue myself with enumerating each of them, I could do without you, Chloe, altogether. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Since your legs, Phoebus, resemble the horns of the moon, you might bathe your feet in a cornucopia. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

You ask for lively epigrams, and propose lifeless subjects. What can I do, Caecilianus? You expect Hyblaen or Hymethian honey to be produced, and yet offer the Attic bee nothing but Corsican thyme?(Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

You were constantly, Matho, a guest at my villa at Tivoli. Now you buy it--I have deceived you; I have merely sold you what was already your own. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

The art of newspaper paragraphing is to stroke a platitude until it purrs like an epigram. (Quote by - Don Marquis)

The book which you are reading aloud is mine, Fidentinus; but, while you read it so badly, it begins to be yours. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Feminine passion is to masculine as an epic is to an epigram. (Quote by - Karl Kraus)

When to secure your bald pate from the weather, You lately wore a cape of black neats' leather; He was a very wag, who to you said, "Why do you wear your slippers on your head?"(Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

See how the mountain goat hangs from the summit of the cliff; you would expect it to fall; it is merely showing its contempt for the dogs. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Report says that you, Fidentinus, recite my compositions in public as if they were your own. If you allow them to be called mine, I will send you my verses gratis; if you wish them to be called yours, pray buy them, that they may be mine no longer. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

You put fine dishes on your table, Olus, but you always put them on covered. This is ridiculous; in the same way I could put fine dished on my table. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

What's this that myrrh doth still smell in thy kiss, And that with thee no other odour is? 'Tis doubt, my Postumus, he that doth smell So sweetly always, smells not very well. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

The qualities all in a bee that we meet, In an epigram never should fail; The body should always be little and sweet, And a sting should be felt in its tail. (Quote by - Edward Young)

Never think of leaving perfumes or wine to your heir. Administer these yourself, and let him have your money. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Audiences are always better pleased with a smart retort, some joke or epigram, than with any amount of reasoning. (Quote by - Charlotte Perkins Gilman)

You are too free spoken, is your constant remark to me, Choerilus. He who speaks against you, Choerilus, is indeed a free speaker. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

What is a epigram? A dwarfish whole. Its body brevity, and wit its soul. (Quote by - Samuel Taylor Coleridge)

You are pretty,--we know it; and young,--it is true; and rich,-- who can deny it? But when you praise yourself extravagantly, Fabulla, you appear neither rich, nor pretty, nor young. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)

Most of those who make collections of verse or epigram are like men eating cherries or oysters: they choose out the best at first, and end by eating all. (Quote by - Nicolas De Chamfort)

Do you wonder for what reason, Theodorus, notwithstanding your frequent requests and importunities, I have never presented you with my works? I have an excellent reason; it is lest you should present me with yours. (Quote by - Marcus Valerius Martial)